Welcome to THE BALANCE PROJECT: a series of relevant and refreshingly candid interviews featuring inspiring and accomplished women talking about balance. I’ve always been curious—and maybe a little obsessed—about how women I admire manage the tragically glorified “doing it all” craze. So I asked them. As I suspected, no one really does “it all.” Everyone’s making sacrifices somewhere. And that should make us all feel a little better. I hope the conversation will be steered toward that reality rather than toward the flawed and dangerous assumption that we should try—or even want to try—to perfectly do “it all.”

BY THE WAY…

  • Looking for THE BALANCE PROJECT, the novel that was inspired by these interviews? It’s here.
  • The Balance Project interview series recently celebrated its first birthday!
  • Fortune ran a feature about The Balance Project.
  • Want to be a part of The Balance Project? Complete the interview.

No. 60: Lindsay Bressler, Entrepreneur

Age: 29
Where I live:
 New York City
Job: Entrepreneur

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Have you changed jobs or adjusted anything in your career to have more balance?
Earlier in my twenties I spent a few years in investment banking. Looking back on it, it was the best decision I ever made because it’s where I met my husband! But, I ultimately left because I wanted a better work/life balance. Ironically, I probably work as many hours now as I did then, but it’s dramatically different mentally because it’s for myself, and I can make my own schedule, which helps!

Do you think having “it all” is realistic or overrated and why?
It’s interesting, because I think having “it all” is really more about what “it all” means to someone. To me, having “it all” is not…. being the CEO of some Fortune 500 company, hands-on raising three kids, having a beautiful mansion, and a husband who walks in every night with a bouquet of flowers while I slave over a homemade three-course home-cooked meal. That’s a fantasy. To me, having “it all” would mean five years from now I am just as happily married as I am today, have at least two, healthy children, a warm and welcoming home, great friends, and some job, wherever that job is, that I’m passionate about and that challenges me. And maybe I’m still young enough that I’m being naive, but I think my version of having it all is realistic. I feel really lucky that I have a lot of that today.

What part of “balance” can you just not seem to figure out?
For me, the challenge with balance has always been about my work life. Every job I’ve ever had I’ve thrown myself into 150%. Even now when I’m consulting, I get super passionate or really curious about something, and I spend way more time than I had planned to, and get paid to, on a particular topic. Work life is crazy, complicated, and frustrating, and it’s hard—especially when your husband or significant other also has a really tough job—to compartmentalize the stresses of your work life and be able to take a step back and enjoy each other in the few minutes that you have together. When we only have two nights a week for dinner, it’s constantly a struggle for me to figure out how I can be more present and in the moment instead of worrying in the back of my mind about the meeting I have the next day. I imagine that only gets harder with kids.

What part of “balance” are you getting better at?
I hope I’m getting better at the work stuff—putting things into perspective—learning that sometimes my job is “just a job.” I can’t solve everyone’s problems right away, and sometimes I do have to take care of myself and stand up for myself.

What was the best advice you ever heard on balance…
From a mentor/co-worker? To trust my gut and put it into perspective. I met my mentor a few weeks ago when I was going through a big transition with work. I spent 20 minutes describing in detail every thought in my head about what happened and my next steps, and when I came up for air she just looked at me and said, “Lindsay, I know this seems like a lot to process right now, but last year you met me and you outlined to me your plan and look where you are today! You’re right on your plan, and you’re doing exactly what you told me you wanted to do a year ago.” It was the most grounding thing someone could have said to me.
From your mother?
My mom is more of my familial role model. Her best advice has been to enjoy my husband and to relax!
From your spouse? Probably like my mom, to relax and that he married me because I am smart, driven, and a hard worker but everything isn’t going to get figured out overnight and I need to be patient and enjoy being in the moment. Our kids and our home 10 years from now don’t need to be planned today.

If you had one extra hour in each day and you couldn’t work or be with your family, how would you spend that hour?
Working out! I love being active whether it’s doing Tracy Anderson or yoga or just going for a long walk around my favorite little neighborhoods in NYC—it really helps me clear my head.

What do you wish you’d known when you were 20?
That I should have paid less attention to Duke basketball and partying (sorry Mom and Dad!) and more attention to all the amazing, interesting classes I could have taken in college.

What do you hope to know by the time you’re 60?
How to play golf somewhat decently… so that I can spend more time with my husband on our vacations!

What one part of your home life do you wish you could outsource?
Cleaning! Laundry, dishes, dusting… it’s the worst!

Whose job do you wish you had?
A fashion/lifestyle editor or stylist, no one specific but just that field in general—I just think it would be so fun to look at amazing things all day or play dress-up with clients and make them feel great and get paid for it!

Whose job are you glad you don’t have?
A doctor—just seeing people who are sick would make me sad all the time.

Favorite books?
I’m really not a book person (I know that is terrible to say especially for this project!!). I want to be a book person, but I find TV really fascinating and a great escape—both scripted and reality.

What are you reading right now?
I’m reading Within by Dr. Habib Sadeghi, but, as I said, I’m not really a book person so I’ve been “reading” it for 3 months… I’m terrible! This is a much better question for my sister…

Biggest vices…
Activity? 
Shopping…I just get inspired by such beautiful things, and I can’t help it!
Food?
 Pasta—any really good al dente pasta is just the worst for me!
Website? Net-a-Porter.

How many hours do you generally sleep at night during the week?
Lately… 8+, I really need my sleep!

What do you read every morning?
TheSkimm—it’s hands down the best summary of the news, and it’s funny!

Complete the following sentences:
I think I: am a really loyal friend.
I wish I: had more hours in the day.

Do you have a personal motto or favorite saying?
No, but I really should…  I did just hear an amazing quote from The Imitation Game, “Sometimes it’s the people no one imagines anything of who do the things no one can imagine.”

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Lindsay_Jeff_Engagement_0147About Lindsay:
Lindsay Bressler was most recently the Chief Operating Officer at Tracy Anderson Method, where she was responsible for leading operations across the studio, media and corporate divisions. Prior to Tracy Anderson Method, Lindsay served as the GM Marketplace for OpenSky, overseeing several areas of the organization including merchandising, business development, email marketing, PR, and business analytics. Prior to OpenSky, Lindsay spent several years in finance both at The Raine Group and Goldman Sachs. At Raine, Lindsay worked with sports, digital media, and entertainment clients on strategic advisory projects and private equity investments. Prior to Raine, Lindsay worked at Goldman Sachs in the Technology, Media and Telecommunications group, working with clients across the media and entertainment space on strategic advisory, M&A, and capital fundraising opportunities. Lindsay has a BS from Duke University.

Find more about Lindsay here:
Facebook: lindsay.bressler.5
Instagram: @lindsaybressler

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